Oprah, Oprah, Oprah....

Ok just to start I am not one to drink the Kool Aid but felt like this was worthy of a blog.

My dear friend Lynn invited me to go with her to Oprah's Lifeclass Tour @ Radio City Musical Hall and I graciously accepted.  Along with Oprah special guest would be Master Life coach Tony Robbins.

I personally have not seen any previous Lifeclass episodes and wasn't really sure what was in store for me. Basically what I had heard that these were tours that Oprah and guest motivators do to help people reach their fullest potential.

I was excited to go but not quite convinced that I would really get anything meaningful out of the experience except for hanging out with Lynn and experiencing Oprah.  For me things like "finding my inner self" and meditation and anything zen like really doesn't mix.  I think by nature my brain can't relax and its an impossibility for me to go to the "quiet place"

As Lynn and I entered Radio City Music Hall we were giddy with excitement.  Maybe this would be the the event that changed the direction of our lives, maybe Oprah and Tony had all the answers or maybe even better she was giving away cars!!!

As we made our way to our seats I do have to say that the energy was definitely exciting.  They had music blaring and the crowd was on their feet. 

At this point Tony Robbins came out and started to get the crowd motivated, he started with some exercises that basically made you interact with the strangers around you.  All I can say is that yes I was hugged and picked up by the woman sitting behind me.  If anyone really knows me the sheer fact that I let a total stranger touch me is progress in itself. 


Most of the people in the audience were 100% into this experience I watched them repeat every word they were told too, take notes, and let everything soak in.  People were posting to facebook and tweeting the entire 2 hours.  I did try to do the same but as I said I have a hard time jumping in 100% so I just looked around waiting for someone to pass me my red juice.

Once Oprah came out the crowd was on their feet and the next 2 hours was going to change some lives.  Oprah and Tony brought people on stage and worked with them to overcome their fears.  And by using these people were trying to get the message out their to all of us....

"We are telling ourselves stories.  The question is does your story empower you or hold you back"?

"You can't have real courage unless there is something you are really afraid of".

Courage is feeling the fear & doing it anyway.

"The only solution to fear is massive action".

"You can't wait for the perfect situation.  You've got to get out there and discover your passion."

While I didn't leave Radio City Music Hall as a new person with all the answers, I do have to say that the message makes sense to me.  Realize what holds you back and hit it head on.  Don't let "your story" (your excuse) be the reason that you say you can't succeed.  The only way to face the fears that hold you back is to change your story and move ahead.  Having the courage to face the fear will be the only way to get results.  And finally you can't sit back and wait for your perfect situation, it's trying new things and exploring that will uncover what it is that brings you passion.


So now that Oprah and Tony have enlightened me of the way to succeed overcoming my fears and being successful, I just have to figure out what is is I want to be when I grow up.

I Had The Time Of My Life...

So this blog is dedicated to my brothers who read my blog and for the most part haven't been able to follow since they don't watch The Bachelor.  I can't understand why they wouldn't be as excited as me to watch this show every week.

As an only sister to two brothers smack in the middle with 4 years between Michael and I and 5 years between John John and I, we have had some interesting times.  I have a hard time really remembering the early years but what I do remember is the torture bestowed upon me by Michael.. Sometimes physical most of the time emotional.  I at an early age was obsessed with movies and with my adult life this becomes all consuming.  "Dirty Dancing" was the movie, Patrick Swayze was my guy, and I had the Time of My Life was the song.  I even had a life size cardboard cutout of Patrick Swayze and Jennifer Grey in my room that the lady from the video store gave me.  Any time the video would come on tv I could hear it and would run to the tv to watch and listen.  Knowing this and my obsession when Michael heard me bounding down the stairs to catch the video as soon as I rounded the corner just about to catch a glimpse of "the lift"  Michael would change the channel.  Bam I would flip out yell and stamp away, halfway back up the stairs I would hear the song again and run back down turn the corner and switch he goes.  This was a constant and I had no power to stop him.

In the cabbage patch craze, I had a Dugger Family worth, all with new names I gave them and special places they belonged.  At this time these dolls meant a lot to me.  So how do you think I felt when one day I walked in my room and they all were hanging from the ceiling with string around their necks.  Even on a chair I was unable to reach them to save them from death by strangulation.

There are so many stories like these that I know everyone has as well.  The thing about Michael is that everyone thought he was just so perfect, smart, polite and just a sweet angel.  These are the ones that are the most evil.

John John seemed so much younger to me growing up and that is chalked up to the 5 year gap between us.  What I do remember though was his obsession with dinosaurs.  Maybe when he was like 6 and I was 11 he told me he was going to be a Paleontologist.  I think I told him to "screw off" thinking to myself what the hell was a paleontologist.  Asshole kid!  I was too busy obsessing over Patrick Swayze and Cabbage Patch Kids to be that smart.


While my brothers were busying playing Dungeons & Dragons, Risk and studying fossils I was busy as well.  Busy playing dress-up,singing & dancing in my room, playing with make-up and seeing how I could annoy the shit out of them.


As you get older and the age-gap seems less important you can start to share similar interests that bring you together.  For example on a family cruise we took before I moved to California was a fine example.  If you have ever been on a cruise you know that you give your credit card and they give you a cruise card that you use and the charges come in your credit card bill.  Well since Michael and I were considered adults at this point we had to use our own card, John John still being a minor had a cruise card billed to my parents credit card.  Ahhh bonding time...Michael and I convinced John John to get all our drinks for a week....a month later poor mom & dad.  I was long gone laying on the beach in sunny California!!!

As any sister knows who only has brothers being in this role makes you the "mother"  reminding them of birthdays, doing their Christmas shopping, wrapping their Christmas gifts, picking out clothes and just being a nag in general.  As "adults" who now have real jobs and families the dynamic changes.  My younger brother at times seems like my older brother (sister sitting) at its finest!!


Even though Michael has lived in DC for 25 years it feels like yesterday he would be banging on my bedroom wall threatening my life if I didn't stop singing "The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow"


Would I have wanted to have a sister, I am not really sure.  I have such close ladies in my life they felt like sisters but for me my brothers are swell.

Au Revoir Assholes!!!

Well after weeks of blogging about Ben The Bachelor this season finally concluded last night with 3 hours of terribly horrific television.  The first 2 hours consisted of Ben saying how much he had fallen in love with these 2 woman and can picture a life with them.  Lindze saying over and over how happy she is to have fallen in love again, blah, blah, blah.  Bring in the terrible bachelor music, helicopter rides, Ben walking aimlessly around, snowy mountains of Switzerland....put me out of my misery.


I never truly understand the end of this show, you have to know who you are choosing before they show up in the helicopters, boats, limos whatever for the final decision.  Ben acted like he was torn 24 hours beforehand and poor Lindze just wouldn't stop talking when she finally got to him.  I yelled at the tv..."just shut up your making it worse he isn't choosing you"!!!  I do have to say she had the most cause to have the mental breakdown after being rejected but she held it together and for that I was proud.  Can you imagine if it was Kacie B. in her position, down to the final two and being rejected.  They would probably have to call the paramedics. And with that Lindze disappears for ever...I think it would have been fitting if they let her ride away on a horse.


Since we all basically knew that Ben was choosing Courtney it was no real surprise.  I have to say I thought she looked amazing but god she really is a disturbed individual.  Between a season of weird facial ticks, baby voices, "winnings", with a glass of wine in hand at all times she won The Bachelor's heart and got that amazing 3 carat Neil Lane cushion cut diamond.


The live show basically confirmed what I thought after last weeks "The Woman Tell All".  Ben chose Courtney but after watching the episodes realized what a psycho she was and he was humiliated.  Again I think he made her apologize.  We found out that they had broken up after the show started airing and Ben basically ignored her for weeks.  She even told us viewers she didn't even get a card or a carnation for Valentine's Day..poor Courtney.  Flash to the end Ben gives Courtney back her bling and they are going to see what happens because they are so in love.


Final thoughts...I do think Courtney psycho but I do think that she loves Ben.  I do think Ben is an asshole.  Have a happy life!!


At least since Ben owns a winery Courtney's glass will never be empty.


Bye Bye Bachelor


xx

No Use Crying Over Spilled Milk!!

Ahhh The Woman Tell All....not to much to say here just a quick recap before the big finale


Just a quick shout out to the blond Zena the Princess Warrior that Chris Harrison invited for the show.  Oh wait that was just Jaclyn, I didn't recognize her since she decided to dye herself orange and suddenly transform herself into looking like a man.  I couldn't look directly at her on the screen with fear that i may go blind.


Anyway obviously this episode is meant for the woman to scream, bitch, laugh, cry and have to endure their most embarrassing moments over again while watching clips of the show.  This is exactly what happened.  We got to see Jenna having a nervous breakdown, Jaime's awkward lap dance with Ben,  Kacie B. downward spiral in the limo, etc, etc.


I have to say that Samantha is annoying and I don't even know why she felt the need to keep yapping it up, I don't even really remember her from the show.  I actually really like Emily regardless of the fact that she raps.  Nicki and Kacie B seem genuinely sweet but at this point kind of pathetic its been months since Ben dumped you its ok to call him an asshole.


This brings us to Courtney, I have a STRONG feeling that the only reason she appeared on the show and apologized is because Ben actually picked her for his wife.  Because of this and how awful she is on the show and the bashing he is getting now that everyone is witnessing this on television he sees what a fool he looks like.  I think he gave her an ultimatum to go on the show and eat crow or ill dump your ass on live television on "After The Final Rose"


I do believe the tears were real, but not tears of sadness for the way she treated the other girls.  These were tears of anger and resentment, when you are forced to do something you don't want to and your so angry but you can't lash out so the only thing you can do is cry.  I know these tears because I have shed them in the past at old jobs when all I wanted to do was curse out my old boss but knew that I couldn't.  I needed my job to pay for my second job which was happy hour.  So all you can do while holding in this anger is cry.  I believe this was what happened to Courtney last night.


Maybe I am wrong, maybe she was sincere in a week I think well possibly find out.


The big finale is Monday, and I can't wait.. Regardless of whom Ben chooses I will be happy this is over and hopefully will find some of my brain cells again.

Chitty Chitty, Bang Bang!!

Tonight's episode was all about the overnight dates in Switzerland.  I have to say that Switzerland looks breathtaking and I would love to add it the list of places I would love to travel to.  Ok back to the the topic at hand Ben finding everlasting love and if any of the final three girls won't put out!


Nicki has the first date and they take if you can guess by now....the cherished helicopter ride over the Swiss Alps.  Totally beautiful but I would have been thinking that one big gust of wind and Ben might not have had to eliminate anyone.  Nicki is fine, I don't know she seems normal enough, sweet enough but they seem more like friends and I don't see any real chemistry or sparks between the two of them.  Plus I feel like she talks a lot, I mean a lot and mostly what is coming out of her mouth bores me.  I am thinking it's possible Ben kept her after the hometown date was because he actually liked her dad more than Kacie B.


Date number two goes to Lindze, whom yes may be very tan but I really like her.  I do have to say that she is a good sport and must really want that Neil Lane ring because she gets the worst dates every time.  From jumping out of helicopters into the ocean and now catapulting down a cliff, I would definitely be pissed.  Lindze has definitely let her guard down and I can see that Ben does like her and thinks they are compatible.  He has said he likes her family and can definitely see a life with her and what a good and smooth transition it would be.  So I think he is saying that Lindze is the safe bet.


Courtney's date was the last and they took a train ride through the country-side and had a picnic.  That is all I can really say because watching them pick out bread and blogging about that...well your reading it, it's boring.  Ben and Courtney do discuss her attitude with the other girls and Courtney does kind of apologize, but I do believe this is solely based on the fact that she knows this could be a reason she won't be "winning" Ben's Neil Lane engagement ring.


All three woman happily accepted Ben's invite to forgo their individual rooms and stay as a couple in the fantasy suite.  I mean Ben has an important decision to make here and who buys a car without test driving it first.


Kacie B. arrives in Switzerland looking for answers from Ben on why he eliminated her.  (On a side note the Swiss water must agree with Kacie B, her hair has never looked better.)  Back to the point, what can Ben say...your dad is a freak and your mom said we can't shack up if we aren't married.  I personally still like Kacie B. and feel badly for her but I do think she is too innocent for Ben. She probably would not have accepted his invite to forgo her own room for the fantasy suite.  Kacie tries again to warn Ben about Courtney and I do believe this is genuine.  I wonder if Kacie B. is still laying on the floor of the hotel.


Ben seems in turmoil as he heads to the Rose Ceremony, he can't stop staring at the pictures of the three woman he "may" be falling in love with.  Enter Chris Harrison who can tell that Ben seems upset tonight and tries to "shrink" talk him through this very difficult time.  Ben seems to show confusion and angst about the Courtney situation but not enough to eliminate her and send her away with a case of his finest wine.  Instead Nicki is set free back into the real world.  She definitely is emotional but only sheds tears no swearing at the camera and sentencing herself to a life alone.  Bravo Nicki!!!

What the F@!# Just Happened???

Hometown Dates Week Y'all!!!


This week was the all important hometown dates.  Ben travels to the four remaining ladies hometowns and get to meet their families.  I don't know about anyone else but I would rather have to share a room with Courtney for a night then bring someone to my parents home as an adult.


First up Lindze, Ben travels to Florida for his visit gets greeted by Lindze on horseback just like their first introduction many many moons ( lol weeks) ago. They go horseback riding and this being Lindze's element it was nice to see her and Ben  and how seemingly natural it was for them.  Lindze's parents seemed like everyday normal people and I think it was sweet that they got married in the same place and Ben and Lindze's first date in San Francisco.  On a side not it made me chuckle that Lindze's dads name is Harry Cox..why? because I am immature.


Kacie B.


Well I have really liked Kacie B. throughout the season but as soon as the band started playing and I saw this grown woman twirling a baton I knew things would turn south quickly.  The first time she did this on their first date was cute this time around it was embarrassing.  From here things went from bad to worse, boring talk at the football field about her grandfather being into the community blah blah blah...go away.  Then her semi -warning to Ben about her overprotective parents..Alert Alert..Red Flag!!!  I don't really understand overprotective parents once you are in your mid twenties, maybe if she was getting into a relationship while on celebrity rehab but this is The Bachelor.  Loved the irony that her dad doesn't drink while Ben is a wine-maker, and unless you can't drink for medical reasons or addiction this scares me.  So Ben meets Kacie B.'s parents and right away you could tell that Ben was uncomfortable , the mom telling him that she does not approve of them living together even if he chooses her and they are engaged.    So no shacking up Ben.  Thanks mom and Dad you just signed Kacie  B up for the limo ride walk of shame.  Assholes!!


Hee Haw it's off to Texas to meet up with Nicki.  I really wasn't feeling Nicki up to this point but I liked this date.  Nicki and Ben went shopping for cowboy gear, who doesn't love shopping and dressing up.  Nicki was very open about her divorce and Ben has said he appreciates the honesty.   It was  also great to see Nicki's family getting along so well even though her parents have been divorced for some time.  I have to admit I too like Ben really liked Nicki's dad and felt sad for him that he blamed herself for her first marriage failing.  Nicki made sure that Ben knew how she felt about him before he left.  Nicki seems mature and put together but ultimately I don't think that Ben will choose her.


Final Date...Crazytown, AZ.  Ben and Courtney's hometown date we definitely see another side to her when she is with her family.  She seems sincere regarding her feelings for Ben but one can never tell if she is being truthful or just has her eye on the prize and will play it for the cameras and to "win".  I found out where she gets her annoying baby voice and body ticks from since her mother spewed out the same annoying tone.  The family seemed a bit fake and a tad stepford like.  Courtney then decided to take Ben to a park where she told him she always dreamed of getting married and decided they would have a faux wedding.  This was incredibly awkward and to me juvenile especially watching Courtney fidget like and 8 year old about to give a speech in front of the class.  She is bizarre.  


As much as each week I complain about evil Courtney/Sybil this season would be boring if she wasn't on it.  I mean who doesn't love a twisted evil psycho like the rest of us.  She is last seasons Bentley.


Rose Ceremony


With only four girls remaining and these dates being so personal because now family is involved this was going to get emotional.  Ben seemed genuinely nervous about hurting someone but this is how the show works he can't keep them all this show isn't called "Big Love".  So roses to Courtney, Lindze and Nicki...oh no Kacie B.  Anyone see when Nicki and Lindze are hugging her and Courtney doesn't know what to so on the side.


I thought that possibly Kacie B would be able to keep it together, nope I was dead wrong.  Not only did we have the sobbing in the limo but our sweet sweet Kacie B was yelling into the camera, "What the F@$% just happened? and again "What the f#$!@ just happened?   


You know what happened Kacie B.  your parents just screwed you big time!!

Bite Me Edward!!

This past weekend Breaking Dawn Part 1 was released.  Ahhh the Twilight Saga -  Edward, Bella & Jacob.  If you know me at all you are aware that when I like something I am in 100%, whether this is clothes, food, music, tv, movies, etc..  When I feel passionately about something I really want someone I am sharing this with to get it as much as I do.

When I was first introduced to the Twilight Saga in February of 2008 I was skeptical that this would hold my interest, boy was I sorely mistaken.  5 days, 4 books and about 2500 pages later I had completed the Saga and started my decent into the madness of "Twilight"  Myself, my sister-in-law Laura, and my sister in laws sister in laws (follow along - Beth & Ally would start an almost 5 year plan that including seeing the movies together, buying the dvd's when released and watching them together.  Yes we were those "older" woman who purchased our tickets on Fandango to see the movie the weekend it was released.  But being more mature and smarter than the rest we would purchase tickets for Saturday morning for the earliest showing.  To us this was genius since we knew that the teenagers who would be seeing this movie would never get up at 8 am on a Saturday and since probably most of them didn't have their drivers license yet there was no way their parents were getting up to drive them.  God were smart.

People are either all in with the Saga or can't understand how "we" are invested in this series.  All I can tell you is that once you read the books ( the movies are not strong enough on their own) you will understand.  And for me personally reading the books and picturing Robert Pattinson as Edward certainly helped the cause. These books were like crack to me, non-stop reading till the bitter end.  When  i was finished reading the books it actually was depressing that it was over.  I actually got jealous when people were reading the series for the first time.

Like I said when I like something I am all in.  I go through phases of cycles for example food, I ate the same sandwich 5 days a week everyday I worked when I lived in San Diego.  Grilled chicken with melted cheese and extra mayo on a roll.  At one point I started making pasta salad and would eat that religiously.  I never get bored of eating the same thing.  If I like a song I can listen to it 500 times in a row, if I like a movie I can watch that 500 times in a row (take "A Walk to Remember" )  I watched this movie almost 3x a week for like 6 months and cried every time.  I also want people to not only watch but to love something as much as I do, I can't tell you how many people I made watch this movie.  I was actually pissed when my friend Annemarie didn't cry.  I mean she must not have been paying attention or something was wrong with her.

Which brings me to another topic, when I am watching these movies of tv shows I am completely immersed in them.  I want to catch every detail.  Whomever is watching these with me has a job to do, keep your mouth shut.  This is an example of a situation that is not appropriate around me....I sit down to watch this weeks Vampire Diaries, in walks my husband who has never seen the show.  "So are they like Edward, do they sparkle in the sun"?  I don't look up.  "Do they both like that Elena chick?" I still don't look up but I am starting to get annoyed and distracted by his ramblings.  "Do their eyes change colors too when they need to feed?"  With this I burst into my tirade that I too am watching this episode for the first time and the shows producers didn't send me the script in advance.  I don't have special powers that allow me to hear over your annoying voice but I wish I did to make you disappear right now.

When we went to see Eclipse in the movie theater we brought a "friend" who shall remain nameless.  This story is what you shouldn't do when you go to a movie with me.  This "friend" decides to buy popcorn and a LARGE coke.  Halfway through the movie tells me that they have to use the bathroom.  I don't even look up because I am trying to understand why they are talking to me in the first place but how could you possibly go to the bathroom and miss part of the movie.  Off my "friend" goes to the bathroom.  Once returned this "friend" says, "so what did I miss?"  Big mistake, this "friend" will never come to the theater with me again.  End of story.

But I did allow this friend to watch the Breaking Dawn dvd with me this past weekend.  Another mistake, this "friend" asked repeatedly what was going to happen next.  People like this don't deserve to watch movies and tv shows with people like me.  I am all for answering questions and explaining complicated plots to people who obviously can't focus but it will be on commercial breaks of after the film is over.  No exceptions.


So next time you want to watch a movie or TV show with me, I'll hand you a piece of paper and a pen and you can write your questions down and we can discuss at the conclusion.