Well today is Groundhog Day and that little creature they call Punxsutawney Phil of whatever you call him predicted another 6 weeks of winter. I don't know about any of you but I refer to my everyday life as Groundhog's Day and have been doing so for years. If I actually woke up to an alarm it would be playing Sonny & Cher's "I Got You Babe" every morning. ( If you have ever seen 1993 "Groundhog Day" with Bill Murray you get this reference.)
Not that I necessarily feel that this is a bad thing but also a lot to think about. Whether your a man, woman, work full-time, part-time, stay at home parent, with or without children life can seem repetitive??? Especially in the winter months when it's cold, gets dark early and I feel like I never see the light of day this Groundhog Day effect really sky rockets.
Do you question the idea of "Is this it, is this what I am going to be doing everyday forever"???
There is nothing more important to me than my family and friends but is it enough? I have lots of questions and thoughts on this topic and I know probably everyone feels differently.
I personally feel like in my 20's I worked and bounced around, different jobs, going out different places each night, events on the weekends. When you have no responsibilities accept for your job and your own well being for me it was a very freeing time. The important issues I tackled back then was where we were going for happy hour and what time would I have to leave to be able to catch the last train home. On weekends it would be how many hours would it be appropriate for me to lay in bed watching Lifetime before I had to get out of my pajamas. Would it be ok that I was eating Cup O' Soup for the 4th day in a row.
The next phase in life was having a family for me, my career goes on hold and all of a sudden you are thrusted into a cycle of repetitive behavior daily. Feedings every couple of hours, food in between, cleaning bottles, making bottles, changing diapers, making sure you are where you are supposed to be for nap time. Everything is scheduled. I am by nature a timely and organized person but definitely felt like this was a complete 180 for me. The feeling of not being able to get up and go when and where I wanted felt sufficating at first. Weekly trips to Babies R Us felt so exciting like I was a kid going to a candy store.
As time goes by you start thinking what about my work, I worked all these years building up my career and now what?? Do I stay home full-time or go back to work. What kind of job can I do that will allow me to be present for my family but also fill fulfilled. I know for different people these choices are easier, some just know that being home as a full-time parent is a job in itself and enough. Others I think like myself realize that staying home full-time is a really hard job and one that wasn't going to make me completely happy. I spent a lot of time feeling guilty about this, why wasn't it enough for me when it was for some of my friends. Was I missing the motherly chip in my brain that should make this ok. I realized that this was ok for me, to want to be a mother and feel challenged in other areas.
Now that I work and have a family it meets some of my needs but it also brings along again what I refer to as The Groundhog Day Effect... every day you get up, get the kids ready get yourself ready go to work, come home from work, dinner, baths, laundry and next thing you know its time for bed. You lay yourself down and what feels like 20 minutes later "I Got You Babe" is blaring..back up get kids ready, get yourself ready...you get my point.
Each year at this time I find myself always thinking what's next...you obviously know your life will change after you have kids but once there here then what, what is the next cycle?? I think I have come to realize that maybe we have to figure out things to challenge ourselves to make the changes to make life exciting. Maybe that is what doing this blog is for me, or the piano lessons I took a couple of years ago, or the improv class, or the half written book I have on a zip drive...
I am not really sure what's next for me and this blog may be a bit of a rant but listening to Sonny & Cher and hearing that the little creature saw his shadow brought this topic to life today.
Happy Groundhog's Day!!
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